5 ways your relationship evolves as you grow and learn

I am emotional, but I can also be very unemotional. What does that make me? I believe the word I am looking for, is human. See, humans can be cold and uncaring when they do not feel anything, but loving and caring when they do. These things, however, become more apparent with age and maturity.
    The other day, I thought about the relationships in which I have been. Some were more important to me, and some not so much. I do not regret anything because I have finally learned what I want in a partner. I have also learned what I can offer
      I thought about how different my relationships were when I was younger, and I realized how much things change with time and age. At first, you’re into something so passionately, and suddenly, you find yourself turned off, preferring something totally different.
      There are five aspects of relationships that fundamentally change with age:
THE LOOKS
 While good looks are still important, beauty has found its way into many new forms. I will admit, I always wanted the queen of everything. Whether it was the queen of my school, or just the queen of the day, wandering the streets of the city in which I was living.
I wanted her, and oh, she was pretty. The problem was it is pretty much all she was and it never lasted.
The shell is great to an extent, but it gets old after a while. If a person’s core is not one you can embrace and naturally gain from, a relationship will not work.
There is a phenomenon called “growing beauty,” and if you haven’t already experienced it, it is yet to come and you will love it. See, a person can be good-looking, but when you add love into the mix, the person becomes gorgeous.
The more emotions invested in a person, the more beautiful he or she becomes. This invites the idea, and strongly states, that true beauty is within a person and not on the outside.
THE TRADE-OFF
She is gorgeous; she is funny, and she is good in bed, but she is not hungry or curious about life. She does not want a career, and she cannot add any input to your conversations that isn’t about her friend’s relationship with Greg or how frustrated she is over Kara’s disloyalty.
Growing up usually means more experience and a better education, which ultimately leads to a better understanding of what a person wants in life and relationship-wise.
You want to be with someone who consistently adds and enhances your life. To draw strength from someone, and to be able to have a good, deep conversation about things is fulfilling and rewarding.
Not only should you want someone with whom you have great chemistry, you also want someone who delivers an intellectual trade-off.
VALUES
Values and culture are closely related, yet they are not the same. Your values come in the form of what is beneficial, what is beautiful, what is desirable, etc. Values usually do not change much, especially not the ones I callskeleton values.
These are the values set as a backbone, the ones you build your life around. If they are similar to your partner’s, it will make things much easier because you will strive toward and live up to the same things.
If you have a lot of disagreement and miscellany, there’s a greater possibility you will end up feeling you are too different.
CULTURE
If you live in a certain city, the girl(s) you date live in that same city. Then, you have the occasional summer camp flirt and culture probably mattered even less then; it was just exiting, nothing else. But, as you get older, culture becomes important. You see, culture is sneaky. Why? Because when you are in love, you strive to be an open-minded person — open to diversity, open to change and open to new things.
Yet, after some time, you tend to slowly but steadily fall back to how things were when you grew up, and to how things always have been.
You grew up in a specific environment where things played out in one way; she grew up in an environment where it played out in a different way.
That doesn’t mean it’s bound to fail, but it does mean you will have a lot of disagreements on how things should be, and you will often find yourself in drama because of misunderstanding or confusion.
Culture is something that becomes more obvious as an important pillar of a relationship as time goes by.
BEING ABLE TO BE YOURSELF
Being able to be yourself is something all boys and girls, men and women try to accomplish. Yes, I said accomplish. Believe you me, it is easier said than done. It is rare to meet someone who makes you feel so comfortable that you can truly be yourself. When I was younger, I would be myself, but not myself — not 100 percent. I would be Mr. 99 Percent. I could never find it in myself to enjoy playing video games whenever I had a girl around. I also never felt comfortable enough to start painting on my comic book sketches. My reality today is much different: I cannot — actually, I will not — be with a girl with whom I cannot be myself. Life is too short, I need to be myself, 100 percent. – Marcus Schuterman/EliteDaily

7 Things You Must Learn From Your Failed Relationship

When you experience a relationship break-up, you usually begin to analyze your past and lose the faith in true love. The feelings of sorrow make you waste your time looking for a reason why he broke up with you. You’d better try to find a lesson in the pain of your past relationship. You should know that relationships give you the chance to grow spiritually and get new and precious experiences. Those who think that they’ve wasted time with the wrong person are not right, because relationships also offer you opportunities to understand your past, your fears, your essence and what the meaning of the true love is. Love is not a simple thing. You need some time to learn how to love and value the relationship with your beloved. I hope this article will help you focus on your past and find the answers to all annoying questions that make you feel worried.
               1. Everyone needs free space Many people think that a true love means that they should spend 24 hours a day together with the person they love. Such schedule will make you lose your identity in a quite short period of time. Remember, everyone needs some free time and space to satisfy their personal needs and do things that make them feel alive. By all means, don’t let your identity die, because it will be difficult to bounce back.
              2. The lust period is temporary This wonderful period usually makes you fly on the wings of love. When you are extremely happy, you spend hours dressing to impress your partner and talking about love till the dawn. Unfortunately, the period of butterflies in the stomach ends fast and amorousness turns into a real and adequate love. Love is the period when you are ready to share both good and bad with the person you love. Love really grows when you have no fear to lose and when you absolutely accept all pros and cons of your significant other.
           3. Other people don’t belong to you Nowadays we live in a democratic world where people are free and have equal rights and responsibilities. Moreover, we are free to express ourselves and lead an independent life. No matter how long you’ve been together, you should understand that the person you love isn’t your property. People who really love each other are committed to this beautiful feeling and treat each other with respect. Your love is your muse but not your possession. You cannot control the behavior and every step of your partner, because it will only break trust in your relationship. The only adequate thing you can do is to trust him and try to create common rules of commitment both of you should stick to.
          4. Complete yourself I do agree that other people can improve you and fill your life with joy and wonderful colors, but you should realize that people will never complete you or live up to your expectations. There’s no need for validation from your partner. First of all, you should learn to cultivate self-love before you can share it with your beloved. Try to develop yourself until you find yourself confident and complete. It requires you to change your actions, thoughts, emotions and behaviors.
             5. Don’t even try to change your partner You can change many things in this world, but it’s almost impossible to change your partner’s outlook and habits. All you can do is to show the right path to your partner and if they have an internal desire to change, they’ll make a shift. A human psyche has the capacity to ignore things and ideas strongly imposed by others. This way your partner may achieve temporary improvements and then return to their casual habits again. If you cannot stand something in your partner, then you should shift your energy and react to the situation in a different way. It’s better to stay calm and respond everything in cold blood.
            6. Get rid of your inner conflicts Your attitude and behavior in your relationship can be the reflection of your fears and anxiety which reign in your sub consciousness. If you want to have a healthy relationship, you should start from healing your inner world from fears and conflicts. Plus, you need to do all possible things to boost your self-esteem. Begin to love yourself and you’ll be able to share your love with somebody else.
           7. Learn how to let go gracefully It seems that some relationships teach us how to honorably let go. After a considerable reflection on the opportunity to build a happy and healthy relationship, you may realize that this love doesn’t cost your time and energy to continue. Unhappy relationships teach you to struggle for happiness. Furthermore, you should use the opportunity to let go of the past in order to be able to find the true love of all your life and cultivate a long and loving relationship. Don’t become disheartened the next time you face a relationship break-up, because it may help you develop a new vision of the world and start a better relationship. Relationships are an important part of your personal development. Both happy and unhappy relationships help you grow and become an all-rounded person. You should be strong enough to overcome the pain and other challenges, if you want to be happy. – Jennifer Houston

Explosion rocks market in Bauchi

A bomb explosion has rocked the ever busy Bauchi Central market, few hours after an explosion hit the Gombe motor park on Monday.

At least 21 people were killed in the Gombe blast that took place early at about 11am.

According to reports, the Bauchi explosion occurred around 5:24pm.

The casualty figure is yet to be ascertained as at the time of this reports, but no fewer than 10 people are reported to have died in the explosion, while the injured have been taken to the Abubakar Tafawa Balewa Teaching Hospital for treatment.

Taxi driver knocks out pregnant woman for grabbing his penis while driving

A pregnant woman was rushed to a hospital after being beaten into a coma by a taxi driver, police in Nigeria said.

The Lagos State Police said that the driver beat the woman, who is seven-months pregnant, on the Lagos-Badagry expressway.

According to the police investigation, the woman approached the driver and asked to be taken to a certain location. The two agreed on a price, and the woman got into the man’s vehicle.

The woman, identified as Feyisara, told investigators that the driver told her to get out of his vehicle before reaching her destination.
Feyisara got into an argument with the driver and when the man tried to push her out of the vehicle, she held onto to his clothes.

The suspect then forcefully took of the woman’s hands from his clothes. At that point, the woman grabbed his private parts. In response the driver punched her in the face, and she fell unconscious.
Police launched an investigation into the incident, but so far, no arrests have been made.

Gay prostitute fatally stabs customer in Abuja hotel room for refusing to pay after sex

A man was arrested on charges of murder after allegedly stabbing a gay man for showing up in his hotel room to have sex, police in Nigeria said.

Abuja Police said that Mohammed Snu, was killed by Mohammed Omar, in Garki.
Snu suffered stab wounds in the abdomen after being attacked with a screwdriver on Thursday.
According to the police investigation, Snu, who was a regular guest at the hotel, invited Umar for sex, but when Snu refused to pay the two began to fight.

A witness at the scene said that when he heard screams coming from the room, he broke down the door. He saw Umar completely undressed and Snu laying dead in bed with stab wounds on his body.
The witness immediately called the police and Umar was arrested. Umar was charged with one count of murder.

‘Paralyzed’ beggar suddenly runs to catch bus after meeting journalist

A beggar was exposed as a fraud after being caught walking.

The beggar who claimed to be a paraplegic, was seen using a skateboard to get around Wenling, Zhejiang, China.

People helped the sad-looking man by giving him cash. The man managed to get the sympathy of many people who thought he was paralyzed from waist down.

The man added some drama to his situation by playing soft music and pulling himself around on the skateboard. One day, a reporter gave the man some money.

The reporter then asked him what else he can do to make his life easier. Rather than thanking the reported, the man replied: “I hate journalists.”
The reporter decided to follow the beggar and learn more about him. To his shock, he discovered that after a day of begging as a paraplegic, the man hauled himself to the side of the road and began walking.

The man took off all his ragged clothes and put them in a bag. He then removed his dirty socks, put on shoes and stood up before rushing to get on a bus

10 Common myths about happy couples you shouldn’t believe. -SEAJOHN

What is the truth about happy couples? Do they really live perfect lives, in perfect harmony or, are they just like the rest of us?! The reality of a healthy relationship is far from the fairy tale image that some relationship myths would have us believe and here are ten of those myths about happy couples that you shouldn’t believe:

1. They do everything together

Everyone needs some time to themselves and the thought of spending every second of every day with the same person would drive most of us mad. Surely, the happiest couples are those that have their own interests, hobbies and some friends outside of the relationship. At least, that way, they have something to talk about.

2. Happy couples have found the ‘one’

It might feel like there is only one person in the world for you, and that is lovely, but the reality is, there are other people out there as well. Taking this myth literally would suggest that you have to stay in an unhappy relationship, because no one else exists for you and, that simply is never true.

3. True love should be like it used to be in the movies

Sorry to disappoint lovers of the romantic movies, but it’s not real life! But then, that’s why we love the movies, it takes us away to an imaginary and perfect place, just for an hour or two, anyway.

4. Happy couples never argue

If you don’t fight sometimes, then you are probably not talking to each other. Happy couples may not fight in public, but you can bet they have their moments, when they are home.

5. A happy relationship makes your life complete

Happy couples don’t instantly forget all their own dreams and aspirations and, if they do, they are missing out. Far from it, in a good relationship, your partner will encourage you to do better and be there to help you achieve your goals, not subdue them.

6. Happy couples always completely and totally understand each other

This is a nice image to have and, maybe, after years and years of marriage, some people have even reached this stage but, for most people, completely understanding each other and never having the odd surprise, is not what a happy relationship is all about.

7. True love means never-ending happiness

Even the happiest couples experience the ups and downs in life that everyone does. It’s dangerous to think that a happy relationship will protect you from all the bad moments. It’s more important to know that your partner will be there for you, when those moments do, inevitably, come.

8. They can’t live without each other

It’s not healthy to think that you couldn’t live without each other and it’s certainly not a requirement for a happy couple. A feeling that just one person is absolutely everything in your life is a sign of insecurity, not a sign of true love!

9. Happy couples only have eyes for each other

There’s a big difference between looking and doing! Of course, happy couples will still notice a beautiful girl or a hunky guy, walking into the room. They wouldn’t be human if they didn’t. It’s the fact that they do nothing about it that really counts.

10. They never tire of each other’s company

If you believe this, then you will believe anything! There are, of course, no hard and fast rules in love and, who knows, perhaps some people do spend all their lives laughing, joking and staring deeply into one another’s eyes. For most of us, though, love needs a little bit more nurturing, so don’t worry if your relationship doesn’t match up to these myths, because most never do!